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Showing posts from September, 2012

Quieting The Soul

I walked to the mailbox today to retrieve Saturday's mail. A task that I avoided on Saturday because my new rule at the moment is to not retrieve the mail during off hours. That means no trips to the mailbox at times when I cannot call someone and address whatever crisis has plagued my poor innocent mailbox and subsequently my peace of mind. This includes Saturdays and anytime after 4pm. Otherwise the bad news just sits in my head and bothers me until I can take care of it. I was never like this before, but lately there have been so many letters and issues that need my attention and require so many hours of time on the phone that it has been the best plan I could come up with.


Sure enough, my mailbox was plagued today. After learning that my health insurance was reinstated last Thursday by Blue Cross and Blue Shield, I got an official letter in the mailbox this morning stating that I had until November 9th to get the situation with Social Security straightened out and get Blue Cro…

Medicare, Blue Cross/Blue Shield, and Me


Note: This essay was written Thursday September 20,2012


My best friend, who also is disabled and struggles with her own chronic health issues, recently made a statement to me in reference to how I was feeling about unexpectedly not having health insurance. She said that for people like us, having your health insurance abruptly ripped away from you is like a person suddenly being laid off from their job. Those of us who are disabled or have chronic illnesses may depend on our health insurance every single day just like most people have to depend on having an income from a job every single day. Once that gets taken away from you unexpectedly, how do you feel?


Anxious.

Angry.

Fearful.



There is a long story to why I have lost my health insurance twice since July 2012 and when I have more energy and more answers, I will blog more about my experiences with the Social Security, Medicare and disability systems. Today, I just cannot because the system has me completely exhausted and wor…

What I Have Come To Understand

 In the two and a half years I have been writing this blog, I don't think I have ever written a post about a doctor's appointment with my rheumatologist. The appointments tend to be pretty significant since the rheumatologist treats the Sjogren's syndrome. I am sure that I have mentioned events that have happened at certain appointments, but I think that has been the extent of it. I think the reason for this is because I don't think people will be interested or that the post may be boring. Today I realized that I may have made a mistake. Sharing information from these appointments with my rheumatologist not only may help someone else, but it also gives other people the opportunity to give me feedback about their experiences with different treatments, side effects, and complications from medications.



I have had more severe symptoms than usual lately with some new ones thrown in for fun. Therefore I have been seeing my rheumatologist, Dr. P, more often than usual. Th…

Partners In A Healthy Lifestyle

The very first time I ever noticed my fiance, I was sitting in my usual pew at church. He was walking down the opposite aisle of the church to sit in his own pew by himself. He had a certain presence about him. Maybe it was his long trench coat that hung on his 6'2" frame or his stylish cowboy hat. Maybe it was his unassuming presence or the gentle way he looked at people when they were talking to him.


The very first time I knew, although I was in denial about it for months, that I was very attracted to my fiance, he was kneeling by my side after church, offering to lend me some of his movie collection as I was trying to recuperate from a very difficult hospitalization. I subsequently fell in love with him for a million and one reasons. Attraction was a part of that love. I was attracted to him on an emotional, mental and of course, physical level. In my eyes, I never saw him physically as anything less than perfect.


So because of this, it came as a surprise to me when last…